Yes, I Will do Your Makeup…

No, I will not do it for free. 

Every year, when Halloween rolls around, I get asked the same question – “Can I get you to do my makeup?!?”

Yes! Absolutely! Assuming you’re within reasonable distance (or willing to pay my travel expenses),  understand hair and makeup are two totally different issues (this is not a 2-for-1 sale here) and are willing to PAY for my work. 

Obviously, you asked me for a reason. You like my work, and I’m flattered! However, flattery alone does not pay our electric bill, help with groceries (trust me…I’ve tried flattering the produce guy and no dice…or extra tomatoes), nor does it cover the expense of the products I’m going to use on you. 

I refuse to use the cheap stuff from a drug, discount or big-box store for anything other than Halloween decorations. 

That go outside. 

If you send me a picture of your dream look, granted, it may take me a week or two to work out (on myself or others), but I guarantee you it’s not going to happen with the $3.00 makeup effect kit you bought, and threw in your basket with tampons and some microwaveable dinners. I pay for products that I see the best results with and am familiar working with. 

And, they don’t come cheap. 

Depending on your “look”, I may have to order colors I don’t have. Or, say I’m doing hair as well, products I don’t have. I’m a MUA and Cosmo, but I don’t keep a complete beauty supply store up my ass. 

So, while I’m flattered you like my work, and might be interested in hiring me to provide hair and/or makeup services for Halloween, here are my rules, if you will. 

1. I expect to be paid for my time, labor and product, just like any other professional service. 

You don’t hire a plumber and hand them a $3.00 part you grabbed at a discount store and expect them to install it for free. Why am I expected to transform you from “X” to “Y”, without the same courtesy? This is an art, that takes years to hone. And, products that will give you the desired look and not melt off your face an hour later, aren’t cheap. 

2. That being said, I expect 50% upfront, 50% after services have been rendered and tipping is still a great idea. 

I’m going to give you the absolute best deal I can. I’m not doing runway or movies anymore. I’m not charging those prices. However, I refuse to spend two weeks planning and perfecting your look, to have you back out. That 50% upfront is my security you won’t, denotes you’re serious and if special supplies are necessary, what’s going to help fund that. It’s non-refundable, BTW. 

3. The more elaborate, the more expensive. 

This should soooooo go without saying. But, some folks just really don’t get a cute kitty nose and whiskers isn’t gonna be the same price as me spending hours blending, shading, hunting down the exact color feather or gemstones you need. 

4. Expect it to take time. 

Yeah. Not to brag, but I know my field. I’m good at it. As mentioned, if it’s a look I’m not familiar with, I will practice and perfect it. 

However, it’s still probably not going to happen in 20 minutes. I am happy to do an online consult. I will tell you, approximately, how long I will need. That’s my work walking out your door and I don’t settle for less than you being happy and me being happy with it. 

5. Time. 

Don’t dare ask me, the day before. Unless it’s a look I’ve previously done and have down, don’t. I need a two week notice – more if it’s an advanced look that may require me to order special pigments or products. 

6. “I make $80,000 a year, and bought this amazing $2,000 costume! But, only have a hair/makeup budget of $20.00 to look like…”

No. Just fucking no. It’s not going to happen and you insult me by even going there. 

7. Halloween?

My prices double day of, unless we have made prior arrangements. Samhain is a sacred day to me, and I very rarely work it. Period. If you expect me to work on what’s basically my faith’s biggest “holiday”, yes. You will be paying me double-time. 

8. My work is mine. 

This is art. As an artist, I will take pictures and I will post them. Do not claim my work as your own. Polite way out? Just say, “Thanks!”, and walk away. Or, be honest and hand the person my card/contact. 

9. No refunds 

Seriously folks – if you’re unhappy, tell me why and what, BEFORE I WALK OUT THE DOOR. I can probably fix it. I also give tips to help your look last, which, should you choose to ignore, is not my problem. I go through everything from how to scratch (heavy makeup, especially when not used to it, itches), how to sneeze, if a contact or eyelash goes rogue…I give you that info. Once I’m out, you’re on your own. 

Granted, I can help you achieve the look of your nightmares this Halloween! I’ll even tell you how to prep your skin before and treat it after, as a courtesy. I do go above and beyond! 

This list isn’t just for me, though. 

If you hire someone to do your Halloween haute this year, or ever, remember – we are happy to help you! Most MUAs love the creativity and freedom that comes from not doing the same ol’, same ol’ bridal and prom looks. 

We do not work for free.